dntfearthereaper: Restraining yourself from making inappropriate jokes in a new friendship because you don’t know if they’ll laugh or start running away
stratifiedsquamousepithelium: rabbrakha: ishaqzaadi: pair waala, peit waala, dukh waala dard hota hai jo har mahine, waise waala dard month waala dard hua jo pain bhi toh humko aaj kuch zyaada hua month waala dard pain killer khaa ke bhi yeh saala phir se waapis aaya month waala dard har saal baara baar hai isne hi rulaaya month waala dard oh my god oh my god ladies and gents,...
Complimenting A Muslim Girl.
Person: Wow you are so pretty.
Muslim Girl: SAY MASHALLAH OR ELSE I WILL GET THE EVIL EYE.
Ok going to bed before I completely lose all dignity.
sketchythought: traceexcalibur: a story about a girl and boy who fall in love with each other at first sight and then the boy reveals he’s an incubus come to steal her soul and then she reveals she’s a succubus trying to steal his and they laugh and go get drinks together That’s actually the cutest fucking thing I’ve seen today.
disneyprincest: when a female hits puberty, her breasts fill up with milk for her future child and stays there until she dies. thats why, when you die, your body smells because the milk starts to spoil. i took AP biology trust me on this one.
earthnation: will u still love me when im no longer young and ok looking
peclro: if you unfollow me, you wont be kissed by your crush on Friday at 1:30. sorry i dont make the rules.
spookythunder: I embarrass myself infront of myself
ashketchurn: I’m pretty sure most of you only follow me because I locked you in with a mutual follow.
cyberbullys: I don’t just want a duck I need a duck
msjewbooty: “i feel u” i say as i begin feeling you. you are soft, like a bunny
drarna: the earth teasing other planets for having “no life”
bitcorn: just saw a guy wearing a nirvana t-shirt lmfao i bet cant even name three noble truths of buddhism
dooblerdoo: whenever I create a text post
lameborghini: girls are annoying boys are also annoying (it is ok for me to say this i am a plant)
mycroft-holmes-approves: sodamnrelatable: Diet ideas: Eat whatever you want, and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight, eat them too.
yasserkhan: Its amazing what a man wearing a suit can do to a woman’s hormones
pantere: do u ever see a boy and think damn you could be a 50,000 note gif post on tumblr
being 20+ on tumblr
Church: Oh I see him, he's sneaking round back behind the cliffs.
Tucker: He must be one smart son of a bitch.
Donut: Ah man, I am so freaking lost. Where the hell is the base!?
castielinablanket: Just remember, no matter what, there’s at least one person in the universe that wants to have sex with you
the-girl-who-laughed: OHHHHHH CUTE BOY! ohhhhh, he’s gay. Or ohhhh he’s engaged/ married/ has mommy issues/is too young
Wow. Just avoided studying for 9 hours. I’m gonna eat pudding now.
the-lonely-scottish-guy: ‘stop being overdramatic’ they say ‘i dont know what you mean’ i say as i descend from the ceiling, surrounded by mist
sodamnrelatable: when someone tries to argue with you on a subject you clearly know more about
is ur name wifi because i’m feeling the connection
I found the perfect umbrellas
canadianslut: ignorning my posts makes your dick smaller
officialdogblog: you is kind, you is smart, you is important,
crybabe: wow you have the best taste in music unzip ur pants
tupacabra: *wakes up with one sock on* whoa what a crazy night
foxnewsofficial: scuba-steve-damn-you: foxnewsofficial: SEND EVERYONE YOU KNOW A MORNING TEXT. WEAR A BOWTIE TODAY. HIGH FIVE STRANGERS. GIVE AWAY LOLLIPOPS. COMPLIMENT PEOPLE. STEAL A CHILD. i’ve already done one of those and now he won’t stop crying and it’s annoying must have been an aggressive high five
durbikins: When I die, I want to be buried with sunglasses on and my hands behind my head. So when I deteriorate, I’ll be the chillest skeleton in the graveyard.
ive come to the point where i dont even procrastinate anymore i just dont do it
alloanday asked: u live
rishtewaliaunty: immigra: rishtewaliaunty: zairahaha: my mom keeps complaining about my ‘hooliya’. welcome to my life She adds adjectives like ‘bhangan’, ‘Pagal khanay say Bhaagi hui’ etc. my mom is very creative mA. all desi moms are super creative in insults Lol my mom calls me kachra rani…
Anonymous asked: Knock Knock
Never mind i'll find someone like you...
laugh-addict: sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead
geekscoutcookies: anakisa: this girl telling me not to eat my cake because i don’t want my thighs to touch they won’t be touching with your man between them
me: shout out to my parents for combining their genes to create the most unattractive, weird, annoying and awkward person ever